You know, it happens to all of us. An argument at work. It may seem like something small - a few harsher words, a cold stare, an awkward silence. But if you don't fix it, that little thing starts to grow like a shadow, spoiling the atmosphere, taking away energy and cutting off the closeness that is so hard to develop in a professional environment.
I have been through it. And I know that after a storm of emotions, when both parties are hurt and frustrated, it's easier to look the other way than to make an effort to talk. But let me tell you one thing - avoiding conflict after an argument doesn't lead to anything good. Running away only prolongs the crisis and causes even more misunderstandings.
That's why today I want to tell you about how - as a woman, a colleague and, above all, a leader - I repair relationships at work after difficult moments. And how you can do the same.
How to repair relationships after an argument?
To repair the relationship after an argument, it is first helpful to cool down and understand your emotions and needs. Then it is important to calmly and honestly communicate your limits and express a willingness to resolve the conflict without blaming the other person. Ultimately, the key is to show respect, be willing to compromise and rebuild trust together.
Do you have difficult relationships with colleagues? Learn how to resolve conflicts during a webinar - Tame the conflict.
Why fix a relationship crisis?
1. stop and look at your emotions
After an argument, it is natural to feel like defending yourself, proving your point, analysing every statement of the other person endlessly. But before you move into a conversation - stop. Feel what's really at play in you.
Is it złness? A sense of rejection? Fear? Shame?
Psychologists often say - 'emotions are like signposts'. If you don't ignore them, they will guide you to the core of the problem. Psychotherapy taught me that it's not just about who was right, but about what each of us felt and needed.
Remember - you are entitled to your emotions. But so does the other person.
2. Do not assume złhese intentions
You know, one of the biggest mistakes after an argument is to assume that your partner (and at work that partner is your co-worker, supervisor, subordinate) "wanted to hurt you". That his goal was to humiliate you or undermine your worth.
And yet, in most cases ... this is simply not the case.
The Meeting Group's experts advise that the principle of the 'presumption of goodwill' should be kept in mind in conflict situations. This changes everything. When I assume that the other person is simply lost, under stress, emotion, pressure - it is easier for me to try to reach a mutual understanding. It's also easier to talk calmly, without the extra złness.
3. Find the right moment to talk
Repairing a relationship is a process. It is impossible to force yourself or the other person to have a frank conversation right after an emotional outburst. Therefore, it is worth avoiding hasty attempts at 'instant reconciliation'.
Wait a while. Give yourself and your partner time to cool down. Then approach and ask: "Can we talk?". Briefly, specifically, respectfully. You will usually hear: "Yes". And then the real work begins.
4. Listen carefully, don't just talk
Once you sit down, the most important thing is one thing: listen to. Don't look for confirmation in the other person's words that you were right. Listen to understand, not to respond.
Let the other person talk about your emotions and experiences. Sometimes you will hear things that are difficult. Maybe unfair things. But if you both choose to be honest and mutually respectful, even painful words will be the start of a healthy dialogue.
5. talk about your feelings - but without accusations
When it's your turn, talk about your feelings, don't judge intentions. Instead of "You always criticise me", say "I felt affected when you criticised my project in front of everyone". Instead of "You are impossible to work with", say "I was frustrated because I cared about our collaboration".
Such messages open the other person up to conversation. They don't push her into defensiveness. Remember also to use your emotions effectively, you will learn about how to transform them to overcome obstacles in the webinar - With eMOTIONS to the people.
6. Find common ground
If you have reached a point where you have both said what you feel - look for a solution. What can you do to prevent a similar situation from happening again? How can you support each other?
Sometimes it will be small things - setting clear rules for collaboration, more frequent short conversations, sharing tasks more fairly. Sometimes bigger changes are needed - changing teams, projects, communication styles.
Advice from an expert:
"After an argument, it is important not only to clarify the situation but also to rebuild a sense of security. Bet on regular, small gestures of mutual respect - saying thank you, acknowledging a point, noticing efforts. This builds a healthy closeness."
Conversations can sometimes be difficult, but improving communication is always a fundamental step to resolving conflict. Learn about how to improve communication in the webinar -. When communication does not work.
7. Draw conclusions and nurture the relationship
Repairing a relationship is not just about 'getting along' after an argument. It is a daily concern for mutual respect, communication and understanding.
If you want to avoid further crises - don't stop talking. Ask questions. Listen. Talk about your feelings. Be attentive to what is changing in your relationship.
And most importantly - don't forget about yourself. Work on your own development. Get to know yourself, your boundaries, your needs and your emotions. Because only when you are close to yourself can you build a healthy closeness with others.
Want to know how to approach conflict? Sign up for our training courses
Want to know how to approach conflict effectively, talk to others respectfully and rebuild mutual contact after crises? Sign up for our training sessions at the Encounter Group! We offer practical workshops where you will learn how to avoid escalating conflicts, how to talk about your emotions, how to listen to the other person and how to build healthy, strong relationships at work and beyond. With our experts, you'll gain the tools to transform your approach to difficult situations and develop confidence in every conversation. Check out our offer and join those who consciously build better relationships!
Thanks to training w Group Meeting you will learn how to deal with difficult conflicts. You will improve your communication and learn how to build better relationships - both in business and in everyday life. One training course that can help you on this path is -. With eMOTIONS to the people!
Remember that you can take advantage of programmes at the Meeting Group that offer the required number of hours of personal development in line with the EMCC certification pathway
In conclusion
Remember - an argument does not have to mean the end of a relationship. It can be her new beginning. A chance to build something deeper, truer. Every crisis at work is a lesson about ourselves - how we respond in difficult situations, how we love our worth and how we respect others.
If you approach the other person with openness, empathy and a willingness to talk, you have the chance to not only repair your relationship, but to make it even stronger.
And if you feel you need support - remember that psychologist, psychotherapy, communication and personal development workshops are an investment in yourself. After all, in any relationship - that at work too - it all starts with you.
Talk. Listen. Rebuild. Because it really is worth it.
FAQ - Frequently asked questions
1. is it worth talking after an argument or is it better to wait?
After any argument, it is important not to leave your emotions alone. A brief cooling off period is necessary, but if you want to resolve the conflict, conversation is key. With thoughtful words, honesty and an attempt to find a compromise, you can repair the relationship and avoid further deepening the crisis in your cooperation.
2. What are some practical tips for conflict resolution?
Here are 6 ways to effectively resolve conflict:
- Calm your emotions before you speak.
- Listen to the other człowiek, don't interrupt.
- Talk about your feelings, don't judge.
- Look for a common solution, not a guilty party.
- Show respect in conversation.
- If necessary - ask for help from someone neutral.
3. is it possible to repair a relationship after a big row at work?
Yes, even after a major brawl it is possible to repair the relationship. However, this requires commitment from both parties, a willingness to apologise, learn lessons and work to improve the quality of the relationship.
5. is every relationship salvageable?
Unfortunately, this does not always work out. Sometimes ending a working relationship is the best solution. If there is disdain, disrespect and constant grievances in the relationship, and the flak has become the norm - consider a break-up or a profound change.
8. What is the greatest threat to the working relationship?
The biggest threats are lack of conversation, lack of commitment on both sides, loss of trust, contempt and ignoring the other person's needs. At work - additionally, it can be stress, pressure and unexplained expectations.
10. Is it worth using training or psychotherapy to improve relationships?
Definitely yes! For couples and couples or co-workers, attending training courses, communication workshops or individual or group psychotherapy are great tools for repairing relationships, breaking routines and learning how to resolve crises. Such support helps you to see the problem from a new perspective and develop skills that pay off in your life together.
